Nike+ Kinect Training

I just bought an exercise game for the Xbox to augment my gym workouts and it's going great!  I don't mean to brag, but I earned the following Nike+ Kinect Training achievements in just the first day!

Clean-Up, Aisle Six - Earned when you completely obliterate your first ceiling fan doing jumping jacks or "starfish" exercises.

Return to the Womb - Earned the first time you decide to curl up on the ground in fetal position and whimper after completing one of of the aerobics exercises in lieu of taking your 30-second water break.  

Three Times a Nasty -  Earned after copiously vomiting at least three times during one exercise session.

Oh, No You Di'n't! - Earned after calling the virtual trainer something so horribly offensive that, if done in a real gym, would definitely result in the immediate revocation of your membership, your forcible ejection from the facility, and might even result in you getting shivved in the neck.

There Is No "Try" - Earned when you straight up quit in the middle of a set and firmly and clearly state “Screw This” regardless of how many times you are ordered "C'MON! FINISH STRONG!"

Shawl of Fame - Earned when you perform an exercise at a maximum of one-quarter the speed your trainer demands while you whine "Eennnngggghhh!" during the whole routine.

Tourette-y, Set , Go! - Earned after stringing together twenty-five consecutive potty words during a set. 

It's Not Yet My Time - Earned after resisting the temptation to "walk toward the light" at the beckoning of long-dead relatives and instead deciding to continue on with the next exercise in your routine.    

See, you cant touch this!  Man, I am totally smoking Jimmydunes on these!  I see from his profile, though, he got the “Clear!! Dammit...Gimme 275 Joules... 3...2...1...Clear!!” Achievement a few days ago but I haven’t been able to reach him for a while to congratulate him.  I’ll catch up with him later, I’m sure.

Well, enough writing.  Time to go get motivationally berated for another twenty-eight minutes assuming my hamstrings don’t go all cartoon-roll-up-window-shade once I finally gather the courage to stand up from this chair.

Talk to you later...