McIdiot...

Yes, of course I have heard the term "pay it forward".  I once pushed a lady's stalled car out of heavy traffic and into a safe parking lot - she tried to pay me. "Pfft, nah," I said, "just do a favor for someone else someday".  I have helped out strangers with flat tires more times than I have fingers to count them on.  It's just what you do.

Yes, of course I have heard that people will sometimes pay for the person in back of them in line at a drive-thru or at some other takeout place if they are feeling especially giving that day.  My awesome sister does it all the time. 

But no one has ever paid for my meal. Ever.  Until today.

I  handed the employee at the window of the drive thru my card and she waved me off, saying its already paid for.  "ERROR... ERROR..." whispered my helpless brain, unwilling to parse the words the woman uttered into something I could understand.  I smiled and nodded like the buffoon that I am and I thrust my card at her again as if she was some sort of vending machine that was being super fussy about trading a Snickers bar for my wrinkly and torn one-dollar bill.

She pointed to the receipt and repeated that it had already been paid for.  I looked at my son and we both shrugged and pulled up to the next window.  We got our food and drove off.

About eighteen to twenty feet down the highway my son pipes up and says "Should we have paid for the person behind us, too?"

Time turned into honey and my brain finally oozed into working order [insert stadium-level slow clapping here].

I said "Yep. Yep we sure should have.  We will definitely need to make it right next time."  I sighed.

Well done, Good Example Man!  Thank you, citizen!  Now onto my next adventure where I push down little kids at Wal-Mart for their Pokémon cards! Quick, to the Inconsidero-mobile!  Awwaaaaayyy!

Sooo... as I type this I realize that simply going back and paying for the person behind me the next time I am there is not going to square everything with the universe.  What if I broke some sort of epically long chain because I just couldn't grasp basic Earth hu-mon behavior like a normal person?

How do I make this right?  How many rosaries must I say?  The balance needs to be restored.  I feel terrible.

Please help!